Empowered and Prepared: A Woman's Guide to Dating Safely

Guest post by Ignite Dating 

Dating can be an exhilarating journey filled with mystery, excitement, and that butterfly feeling we all know well. But unfortunately, it can also pose many threats, particularly for women, which is why it is important to know how to keep yourself safe on your dating journey. There are numerous articles highlighting the horror stories experienced by ladies around the world, and while some may seem far-fetched and exaggerated, they stand as a chilling realisation of why you should be always prepared and aware.

No matter how the person makes you feel, how many sweet messages are sent your way, or how much you think you know a person, romance should never overshadow the importance of dating safely. Having checks in place from day one will not only help ensure your safety, but it will also give you the confidence you need to conquer the dating world.

Whether you’ve met someone through a matchmaking service, an online dating app, or even an introduction from a friend or an acquaintance, we’ve compiled a list of our top tips to make sure you stay safe on your date and walk into that first meeting with your head held high, confidence beaming, and not an uncertainty in sight.

Meet in a public place

Now this usually goes without saying but in the modern dating world it’s becoming more common for dates to invite you over to their place for ‘Netflix and chill,’ but we would strongly advise against this. A chilled-out evening with your feet up in good company may seem like a welcoming invitation after a long day at work, but it’s not worth the risk. Arrange the meeting place somewhere open and public instead of a secluded area with nobody in sight. This will not only help calm your nerves on the date but with national safety campaigns like Ask for Angela, certain venues will have trained staff to help you get out of a tricky situation if you find yourself in need of help.

Tell someone where you are going

Before you even leave for the date make sure that you have told someone, whether it’s a trusted friend or family member, where you are going, who you meeting, and what time you are due to come home. This way, someone will know your whereabouts, they will know when to expect a call or text from you, and they can also check in with you if they are concerned that they haven’t heard from you for a longer period than expected.

Your instinct is your best guide

If something doesn’t feel right, whether it’s the person, the atmosphere, or your date is telling you things that really don’t line up with what you’ve spoken about before, trust your gut. If you feel uneasy or threatened in any way during your date, or even before, get up and leave. You don’t owe them anything and nothing is worth making yourself feel uneasy. A lady’s gut instinct is a powerful tool and one that should never be ignored.

Organise your own transport

Let’s forget the cliché of a gentleman picking you up at your front door with a bunch of red roses, whisking you away to wherever he’s lined up. While it sounds delightfully chivalrous and something from a fairy tale, it is also an open invitation to threat and endangerment. Whether you drive your own car, book your own taxi, or ask a friend to take you and pick you up, make sure you are the one organising your transport, so you know exactly where you stand.

Protect your personal information

You wouldn’t give a stranger your personal details and the same rules apply to a date, but this starts before you meet them. When choosing a profile picture be sure that it doesn’t include sensitive information. Don’t take it in front of your house or workplace and avoid taking pictures with your numberplate visible. These mistakes are easily made but it’s even easier for someone to gather this information and use it against you. If in doubt, keep it private until you know them better and you’re sure it’s moving in the right direction.

Communicate your boundaries

Everyone has their own boundaries but it’s up to you to ensure that they are clear from the get-go. Whether it’s physical touch like a ‘harmless’ hug, your personal space, or even a conversation topic, make sure that your date understands your limits and respects them. If he doesn’t value them, it says a lot about him as a person and is a big red flag – one that you should avoid.

You are not obligated to be there

Don’t ever forget that you hold the reins on your side of the date, so if you feel uncomfortable, you don’t feel the right connection, or you simply don’t want a second date…these decisions are yours to make, and you have every right to do so without feeling like a bad person. Life is too short, and the power is in your hands not to settle for anything less than you desire.

Make sure your phone is fully charged

This again goes without saying but the importance of it is pivotal. Everything we do is on our phones and most of us will be running low at least halfway through the day, so make sure that it’s on charge while you get ready and fully charged for when you leave. If you’ve not had a chance to re-charge, then always carry a power bank in your purse, giving you the chance to top up when you need it most.

Do your research

Something that is becoming increasingly prevalent these days is guys wanting to meet you straight away because they are bored of having ‘pen pals’ who don’t end up going on a date. Firstly, you will meet your date when you are ready to do so, and no sooner. But secondly, this will give you time to do your homework. A quick internet search can provide useful information about the person, and this can be cross checked with their social media, as well as the conversations you have had, just to make sure everything checks out. Do not ignore red flags, and again, trust your gut.

Use a trusted source

With so many dating platforms around it’s unsurprising that a lot of them don’t conduct background checks. Why? Because they don’t have to. But this doesn’t mean that it’s ok. Whether you are considering a matchmaking service or a dating app, use one that investigates the people they serve so that you can go into your date feeling confident that you know who you’re meeting. If you would prefer a more detailed insight into the person you are potentially going to be dating, consider using a matchmaking service that offers digital footprint and ID checks and one that meets every client face to face. This additional layer of security ensures that your date has been vetted by a third party and gives you the added comfort that all the essential points to keep you safe have been checked off for you.

Dating is an exhilarating adventure, and we want you to feel empowered and unstoppable every step of the way. By following these simple tips, you know that you can go into your dates with confidence, assertiveness, and a backup plan if you need it! Remember ladies, stay vigilant, stay informedand never settle for anything less that you deserve.